Sugar Coma

Touch my soul <3

2007-01-30T04:48:00.000+03:00

Things I have don't last for long
Boys have come, and boys have gone
I've grown accustomed
I never really cared too much
Don't get attached
Because I know them
And what they're after

I let them in we make some noise
They let themselves out
That's their choice
Boys will be boys
The phone won't ring and I become
some anecdote
And though I've had my fun
It gets lonely

Then came your kiss
and all I was missing
Was there in your eyes
Your lonely brown eyes
Please say You'll stay
Say you'll never go away
My discarded heart has finally found a home
I know it's love
You touched my soul

When I see you I catch my breath
Forget my sorrow
And I miss you before you've left
You are tomorrow
Here in your hands I find a chance
to make it through
To be somebody
Stay with me

I need your kiss
Cause all I was missing
Was there in your eyes
Your lonely brown eyes
So please take my hand
Let me help you understand
Two searching hearts can rest and be made whole
I know it's love
Please let me touch your soul

2007-01-17T16:13:00.000+03:00
it only hurts me to continue on like this. i keep hoping for a magic word that will make you snap out of it and do what you and I both know you should do. i just want to protect myself from hurting like this anymore and I'm out of ideas. so i'm attempting to build a wall against you.it's why i dont really wanna talk to you about much asside from plans being made. i dont want to open up to you anymore. i want to fall out of love with you. i want to be indifferent. i cried the whole way home.I CRY ALL THE FUCKIN TIME.i'm sick of it. there's just no fucking point anymore....i want to turn it all off

All i want for Christmas is...

2006-12-22T15:51:00.000+03:00

"your dick in a box"

step 1 - you cut a hole in the box
step 2 - you put your junk in the box
step 3 - have her open the box

OR the sugarcoma way

step1-hack the dick off
step2-throw it in the box whilst its still warm and twitching
step3-wash the blood and flesh from your dentures

LMFAO i hope thats what santa brings me...i've been a good GOOD girl.

Time!

2006-12-10T01:14:00.000+03:00

Indifferent!

Emotionless!

Cold hearted!

However you want to say it, it's growing on me more and more each day. It's easier to just not care rather than to feel.Tick tock, time goes by, faster than we realize. So fast, yet sometimes so slowly.Think back a month ago. A month is so long, but in the big picture a month is nothing. Why then, do things seem so different than they were merely a month ago?No major change..little things have more impact. Someday you'll see what I mean.Someday!I hate you so much.Or at least I want to, and try to convince myself that I do. So raw, so real. You just don't get it.I'm mad at myself, but I always find a justifiable reason.Smooth talker. Impossible to figure out. Excuses, excuses, excuses.You're quite good at those. Just remember actions speak louder than words!

I love this quote about time from Grey's Anatomy:

"For everything there is a season,
And a time for every matter under heaven:
A time to be born, and a time to die;
A time to plant, and a time to pluck up what is planted;
A time to kill, and a time to heal;
A time to break down, and a time to build up;
A time to weep, and a time to laugh;
A time to mourn, and a time to dance;
A time to throw away stones, and a time to gather stones together;
A time to embrace, And a time to refrain from embracing;
A time to seek, and a time to lose;
A time to keep, and a time to throw away;
A time to tear, and a time to sew;
A time to keep silence, and a time to speak;
A time to love, and a time to hate,
A time for war, and a time for peace.""

"Time heals all pain, but for some it may take a little longer."

"Forgive, sounds good
Forget, I'm not sure I could
They say time heals everything
But I'm still waiting."

"Time heals all wounds, unless you pick at them."

This entry is basically all about HIM.And it says fuck a lot too.Oh well, what can you do.:/

Random

2006-11-30T09:29:00.000+03:00

-i cant carry on like this anymore but i dont know how not to!

-yes,it's true! even brilliant people are full of shit, i didn't realise that until i met you!

-I really, REALLY like *you*. I'm so smitten and it borders on pathetic. Being with you is really amazing, and I can't wait to be in the same room with you again. When you talk, it's like the narrative out of my favorite movie.

-You fuckin stupid whore!I hope you're gang-raped by 30 greasy homeless guys who break every bone in your fuckin face after they're done.

-still.obsessed.with.you. we've known eachother for like a year!but it's over now!WTF is wrong with me? GOD...I'm so lame.

-please, love me. just love me. or want me. or act as though you want me or need me. please, just want me.

-to a stupid cunt: why do you go OUT OF YOUR WAY to think up vulgar things to say that are aimed at me. I refuse to aknowledge what you said, but damn! I've never crossed you other to have a different opinion than you (okay and maybe NOW cuz of this "fight" with your friend). I hope I don't have to run into you anywhere, cuz it'll get ugly and it's likely I'm the one to look stupid. You rarely know what the fuck you're talking about, but you're so cool arent you? So hard. So punk. Fuck you, you ignorant cunt.

-oh god i cant wait to see you, this weekend is going to be fun. i dont care what happens between us.

-You are such a fucking child sometimes.

-I miss you so much. I was doing completely fine until that fucking dream I had. It was like a trip back in time.... it was so painful to wake up and know that things are different. Is there even a chance that we could start over fresh?

Phew..it feels so good to let it all out!

Life is beautiful

2006-11-21T20:41:00.000+03:00

Isn't amazing that just when you're givin up or lost something unexpected can change everything!

*dances around*

Happy,happy ...joy,joy!

I heart my friends
i heart my family
i heart my sister
i heart the boys in my life
i heart music
i heart dancing semi naked in my beedroom
i heart hash
i heart my new laptop
i heart HIM

i'm just finally happy. I havent been in a whille. Its really great.
Kinda overwhelming at times...it scares the shit outta me sometimes.Even tho things are kinda hard and soon to be harder. I'm still happy!
I hope this feeling never goes away!

I feel SO good!
Plz let it stay for longer than a week!

Pathetic!

2006-11-05T01:09:00.000+03:00

ok so ever since i broke up with my x( like 9 months ago),i've been like seeing/dating/hooking up with a lot of random guys, many of which I don't even really like.I'm so freakin embarassed about it.It's SO not me.You see i have high standards.And it's definietly not about the attention...cause i get a lot of attention like all the time to the point where it gets annoying actually.
I don't know WHY i'm doing what i'm doing?but somehow i just can't stop,it's getting too addictive....i feel like there is a hole ,an emptiness that i wanna fell.
Anyway,it got worse when i broke up with my boyfriend.It's like i don't care anymore...or maybe by creating non-relationships is just a way of saying i'm not ready for a serious relationship and commitment that it comes with it...i dunno!!I'm SO confused!

The thing is those random guys could NEVER hurt me...casue i don't give a fuck about them.i'm just in it for fun whereas with the one i really like he would have that kind of power over me.and i really like the fact that i control things like i can end any of those random "relationships"" anytime i want and i wouldn't even feel sorry or bad about it.

Whatever the reason is...this thing is getting out of contol.It has to stop.It all started out as a "fun" thing but now it's actually a problem.I feel like a slut and i hate it.
i MUST have more self control, i must.

To :T my best "FAKE" friend

2006-10-18T06:06:00.000+03:00

It's been almost a month now...and you still act like a fuckin bitch...i really dunno what's your problem is?!!And i shouldn't care by now...but i fuckin do..cuz i thought we were REAL friends.I hate how fake you are now..you're just
so fucin fake...it's sickening me.

Well I tried with you T, I fucking tried my best. I apologised, and if you only knew how hard it was for me to do that shit then maybe you'd appreciate it... But whatever! I gave you the choice, take it or leave it, and you left it...It's still there if you decide to pick it up, but I'm not trying anymore...i'm SO TIRED and you don't get it...you never did.

And you know what it kills me to say this..but i guess i'm over this called "friendship"!

emo slut much?

2006-10-13T03:27:00.000+03:00

Sometimes late night emo talks make me sad.
but happy at the same time.
'cause it's nice to have someone to be sad about.
if that makes any sense.

when i wake up tomorrow, will you still feel the same?
when i wake up tomorrow, will you have changed?
'cause i still feel the same...

insomnia is a bastard

2006-10-08T02:39:00.000+03:00

..and i just spent the last ten minutes looking for my cellfone that i was holding in my fucking hand!!

I've come to the conclusion that i just might need to seek help for this little problem.Sleeping pills stopped working for me a while ago, i gave up on those things..like totally.

can a person die from lack of sleep?! BLAH! maybe i'll create an alternate personality and start some underground boxing clubs HA!that'll help pass the time i'm sure

In the meantime, there is absolutely no point to this post and i have no idea why i'm creating it.

Show me your grillz...Bitches!

2006-09-28T01:11:00.000+03:00

WHAT
THE
FUCK!
Welcome to nightmare town.

Do people find that sexy?!!Seriously...
I think that shit is nasty....but apparently it's the hot thing to do now...But honestly they only look hot on rappers.
I like how the baby phat models looked all lovely with these fuck off diamonds in their mouth, way to go kimora. you could tell the models weren't comfortable with them at all...i mean look at her she looks like her teeth are rotten.I guess it's just a new way to show off a bit of the ol' bling bling.

what a waste of diamonds!

do people eat with the grill in or is it like a retainer where you take it out
beforehand?

DAYYYUM!!

Dear X

2006-09-10T21:11:00.000+03:00

What are you wasting your time on me for?!! You're one of those guys...who can get any girl they want... but you're wasting you're time on me!!and I am no Cinderella. Not even close.And I must sound really ungrateful but what it really is, is paranoia.

I don't want you to leave.
And I figure that's exactly what you'll do.
Get in her pants and find someone else.
That's usually the case.
I wish that wasn't the case with you.
I don't want that to be the case with you.

I've been fucked with so many times before.It's almost a reflex as of now for me to assume that the next person who comes along is bound to just jump on the bandwagon and fuck me over like everyone else did.

What if..?

What if not?...

Nip/tuck

2006-09-06T16:04:00.001+03:00

Boob job?botox?and everything in between! I fucking love this show.YES bitches...it's baaaack and oh it feels so good to have it back....i've waited for sooo long for season 4,and the premiere episode was beyond amazing (as usual and as expected).

I think it just keeps getting better and better. I wanna see how they top last season.Oui it's a whole post dedicated to nip/tuck...RESPECT!!
Anyways... somewhere i heard a rumor that Christian might discover he's bisexual or come out as bi or something like that.

my favorite character is Christian (of course) I find him incredibly sexy, and NO not just cuz they show Julian's ass in every other episode, because he's a very complex and complicated character. The only thing that puts me off about him was that episode where you find out he was molested. his crying scene just didn't hit me emotionally. ..and i love Gina... she's hysterical.My favorite plot was prolly the transexual thing and the way it ended between Matt and that pre-op dude. [well i guess he was "post-op" by the end, but :P

In your room!

2006-08-28T09:49:00.000+03:00

So i'm at work and bored outta my ass.VERY slow day today..which is kinda good cuz i'm feeling sooo lazy and unproductive.My co-workers are being too bitchy as usual....whine whine whine!!

Anyways,this post is pretty much pointless,i'm pmsing like hell and i don't feel like doing anything at all...i even cancelled my massage appointment ( even tho i'm in a desperate need for one).I've been listening to this song called "in your room" by Depeche Mode all morning it's so amazing...i just can't stop listening to it! u bitches should go and download it like RIGHT NOW!

..here are the lyrics:

In your room
Where time stands still
Or moves at your will
Will you let the morning come soon
Or will you leave me lying here
In your favourite darkness
Your favourite half-light
Your favourite consciousness
Your favourite slave

In your room
Where souls disappear
Only you exist here
Will you lead me to your armchair
Or leave me lying here
Your favourite innocence
Your favourite prize
Your favourite smile
Your favourite slave

I'm hanging on your words
living on your breath
feeling with your skin
Will I always be here

In your room
Your burning eyes
Cause flames to arise
Will you let the fire die down soon
Or will I always be here
Your favourite passion
Your favourite game
Your favourite mirror
Your favourite slave

I'm hanging on your words
living on your breath
feeling with your skin
Will I always be here

P.s i dunno what's gotten to me?or why i did it after what he did to me?BUT i sent him a txt msg this morning " morning my fav slut" and he CALLED..he never calls fom work..he's like always busy and shit.He didn't talk much but it was nice to hear his voice it's been soo long.Oh and he promised that he'll call tonite (HOPE HE DOES)...ok just for the record, this is sooo NOT ME but i'm being emotionally weak and i blame my pms for all of my fuck ups this week!

Girls just wanna have fun...

2006-08-19T12:23:00.000+03:00

i love being a girl... you know why? because i love beauty regimens. being a girl is eyeliner and thongs, pore strips and waxed legs and hot,sexy nail polish on your finger nails. being a girl is lip gloss and being able to wear every color of the rainbow-- especially pink-- without getting flak from the other guys.

I love colors, too. So i've been painting myself for awhile... eyeshadow is one of my hobbies. i collect every color i can find. i have this amazing day-glo green... it's amazing how different you can look with an extra stroke of green...or pink... on your lids.

If you hadn't already guessed, i dont have much angst today. I'm too tired for angst.It's been too fucking hot. I think the heat is melting my brain. its been making it very difficult to emote.
all i really want to do is drink lemonade and take a cat laden nap.

and i want to be in love. thats not too much for a girl to ask, is it?

It's the end of the world as we know it....

2006-08-13T01:19:00.000+03:00

and i feel FINE!

http://msnbc.msn.com/id/14083809/sit...week/?GT1=8307

So I used to watch those ancient prophecies programs almost ten years ago that predicted the end of the world was going to be the holiday season of 2012. And then others predicted 6.6.06.... I'm sick of thinking. When it comes I guess, it comes. I don't know what to think. A lot of life changing events are going on but no more than when we weren't alive.

Drifting Away

2006-08-01T02:52:00.000+03:00

Sometimes it's funny,you turn around one day and realize that you have absolutely nothing in common with someone that you used to basically live and breathe. It's hard to get used to,but it happens more than i'd like.My best friend is a stranger all of a sudden... it's like i dunno who this girl is anymore.It's sad but i don't think it's my fault, maybe it's just our paths are branching off or something.

skinny jeans

2006-07-20T22:37:00.000+03:00

I FEEL FAT TODAY!
I went shopping and i found a cute pair of shorts i tried 'em on and they DID'NT FIT!!Goddamnit!!*cries* It's not like i'm fat or anything...but i dunno i feel like my thighs got bigger or something. I HATE to diet.I NEVER diet so i guess i'm gonna hit the treadmil *CRIES* I'm too lazy for that shit...But i guess i have no other choice.I'm gonna fit into those shorts if it kills me!
Anyways!

SKINNY jeans!!

Does anyone like this look?
They've been around forever now and when i first saw 'em I thought they were kind of 1980s. Then one day i was browsing the net and saw some pictures of a mod girl wearing them they looked HOT,so I had to go buy a pair. But i don't like them on me,they make my thighs look bigger :( Ideal with flats tho!
They're most definitely not for everyone...in fact i think they only look good on modles cuz they're like super skinny and tall.
Skinny jeans GO AWAY and DIE please.kthnx!

It's ALL about the Depp!!

2006-07-15T23:09:00.000+03:00

So i finally watched POTC 2.Had sucha wonderful time,needless to say johnny was hot,sexy and down right funny as usual and as expected.The movie itself was good,but not as good as i expected it to be or maybe i just had high expectations whatever.i definitley liked POTC 1 more.espcially the storyline and ending,but this one wasjust as funny.
Even tho quite a lot of the jokes didn't work very well, it was way too long (especially the first hour).Also there wasn't enough Captain Jack...strange, since Johnny made the first movie like oh so popular, you'd think they'd put him in every frame!BUT NO THEY FUCKIN DIDNT :'( .They also recycled a lot of jokes from the first movie... which i thought was pretty lame!And there was way too much action and not enuff plot.Its like they forgot about what made the first one so good, the humor, and the originality and decided instead just too show off their CGI effects.
All that said,I LIKED it,it was an average family kinda movie-What i hated the most was the fight scene on the moving wheel...got a bit boring and annoying.
But becareful people the movie is looong,so you might need to use the toilet before you get in, seriously i didn't know it was that long...i mean 2 and half hours (but 2 and half hrs of Johnny is never enuff)!!!DAMN thank god i was in gold class.But i wasn't comfortable at all i needed to pee so bad and the a/c didn't make it any easier.

Anyway,there was this girl that was sitting next to me and all the while she was like making out with her lover/bf whatever like all the time...i wanted to bitchslap her so bad.She fuckin ruined the movie for me with all her noises and giggles...AAHHH so annoying.Since when people started to make out in the movies...DAMN.like i needed a reminder that i'm single :(
She was so rude too,i asked her to keep it down and she was like "ok sorry" and then she laughed so hard...BITCH.He was touching her in like weird places and she ended up putting her head between his thighs and i was like "WTF!!! is she gonna like blow him or something?" It was getting too much for me to handle so i ended up changing my seat...thank god i went in the morning,so it wasn't that crowded.They didn't watch the movie they didn't even look at the screen...i bet they just wanted a dark,cold place to make out....BITCHES!!

Anyways!! back to the movie,all in all it was enjoyable and u should all GO and see it.If only for the eye candy...speaking of which is it just me or is Johnny like the only guy who really has gotten hotter with age?*DROOL*
I actually think the third movie will be better..i mean KIETH fuckin RICHARDS is gonna be in it as captain Jack's dad how cool is that?... this one just seemed like an unnecessary link between the two.

Your first love...

2006-07-11T04:55:00.000+03:00

Do you think you ever really get over your first love?!
i dont think i have....completely.I mean i dunno...in some ways i just haven't..it's not like i want him back or anything (even tho i STILL miss him like mad) and i kinda feel like he has very definitely gotten over me,but it still makes me super sad if i think about how things turned out .Sometimes i wish it had never ended.
Anyways,the main problem for me is that i haven't had a good relationship since...not even a semi good one,even tho i hooked up with so many guys but they were all just scumbags...or just totally wrong for me.I dunno what's wrong with me these days i keep thinking about him A LOT and i have to admit i STILL have his fone number saved in my cellfone...and i keep thinking about calling him all the time (i will NEVER do it tho) ...meh
it's complicated!!

To him with kisses and bruises
2006-07-11T04:10:00.000+03:00
So fuck you and your untouchable face....
And fuck you for existing in the first place....
And who am I? That I should be dying for your touch?
And who am I? I bet you can't even tell me that much....

Another love I would abuse,No circumstances could excuse!

2006-04-21T20:03:00.000+03:00

Bared my soul and not sure what to think or do. I try not to trust my emotions anymore they seem weak and pointless.

Happy Birthday To Moi!!

2006-03-08T19:39:00.000+03:00

Today is my birthday
And I get one every year
And someday hard to believe
But I'll be buried six feet underground
I'll be dead and gone, no longer around
I'll be buried six feet underground

people that don't work!!

2006-03-05T03:18:00.000+03:00

Piss me off...they really do.

I know this girl,and she didn't work a day in her life.She's completely dependent on her parents...like 100%.We were talking about it the other day and she was like "as long as i get all the money i need,why should i work?".She's in her early 20's and she doesn't even think about getting a job...she does nothing but shopping and partying...how shallow is that? I'm not tryin to judge or anything..in fact i envy her sometimes...and i was like that before i got a job...but now that i'm making my own money it feels different...like it's really mine,you know...like i'm somehow independent.

However, i really resent wasting so much of my life working while other people get to not work.It's not like i hate HATE my job (i mean sure it gets stressful at times).But until I am completely 100% content with how I am spending my life 5 DAYS A WEEK I will always have an issue with people that do FUCK ALL.

The ones that are depressed and miserable are the worst, it's like FUCK YOU AND YOUR PITYFUL BULLSHIT NON WORKING MISERY!! Students don't count. People that work only sporadically don't count.It's people that are too fucking weak to deal with life, that get signed disability (lose your legs you miserable fuckers then we'll see how life is so fucking bad... THEN have some disability) I can undestand if someone is getting disablity cuz they are physically disabled, i mean FUCK Id much rather have full physical ability and work, but people that get disability for being pathetic and excuse branded weak fuckheads.. just NO NO NO.

I don't know how people can NOT work! I would get so bored! My job is so damn stressful at times but if i didn't work i'd be bored as fuck..i mean work keeps my mind busy and believe it or not it keeps me sane...cuz when i have too much free time i tend to think about things WAY too much and i tend to over analyze EVERYTHING.

I genuinely feel sorry for all these lazy scumbags with no jobs because they must feel so worthless. How can they afford to live?

Don't Mess With the Sex Fairy!

2006-02-22T05:45:00.000+03:00

So i got this email today that i'd like to share with you people...Cuz it's about something we ALL love...S E X!

Actually,it's a silly Fw thingy..but since it encourages ppl to fuck..i'm all for it. I didn't change a word! I'm not messing with the sex fairy!

1-Sex is a beauty treatment. Scientific tests find that when women make love they produce amounts of the hormone oestrogen, which makes hair shine and skin smooth.

2. Gentle, relaxed lovemaking reduces your chances of suffering dermatitis, skin rashes and blemishes. The sweat produced cleanses the pores and makes your skin glow.

3. Lovemaking can burn up those calories you piled on during that romantic dinner.

4. Sex is one of the safest sports you can take up. It stretches and tones up just about every muscle in the body. It's more enjoyable than swimming 20 laps, and you don't need special sneakers!

5. Sex is an instant cure for mild depression. It releases endorphins into the bloodstream, producing a sense of euphoria and leaving you with a feeling of well-being.

6. The more sex you have, the more you will be offered. The sexually active body gives off greater quantities of chemicals called pheromones. These subtle sex perfumes drive the opposite sex crazy!

7. Sex is the safest tranquilliser in the world. IT IS 10 TIMES MORE EFFECTIVE THAN VALIUM.

8. Kissing each day will keep the dentist away. Kissing encourages saliva to wash food from the teeth and lowers the level of the acid that causes decay, preventing plaque build-up.

9. Sex actually relieves headaches. A lovemaking session can release the tension that restricts blood vessels in the brain.

10. A lot of lovemaking can unblock a stuffy nose. Sex is a natural antihistamine. It can help combat asthma and hay fever.

FIN!

Wish you a very "hot" sexing!

yours truely,
The "Hot Sex Fairy" ;)

"My Favorite Mistake"

2006-02-15T22:34:00.000+03:00

Okay,so i'm no fan of Sherly Crow i mean i think she's ok,but for some reason i can't stop listening to this song of hers...it reminds me of my EX...awww....ok enuff with the sappy BS here are the lyrics....*RESPECT*

I woke up and called this morning
The tone of your voice was a warning
That you don't care for me anymore
I made up the bed we sleep in
I looked at the clock when you creep inIt's 6 a.m. and I'm alone
Did you know when you go
It's the perfect ending
To the bad day I was just beginning
When you go all I know is you're my favorite mistake

Well, your friends are sorry for me
They watch you pretend to adore me
But I'm no fool to this game

Now here comes your secret lover
She'd be unlike any other
Until your guilt goes up in flames

Did you know when you go it's the perfect ending
To the bad day I've gotten used to spending
When you go all I know is...You're my favorite mistake

Well maybe nothin' lasts forever
Even when you stay together
I don't need forever after
It's your laughter won't let me go
So I'm holding on this way

Did you know, could you tell
You were the only one
That I ever loved
Now everything's so wrong

Did you see me walking by?
Did it ever make you cry?

You're my favorite mistake x2

2006-01-24T21:33:00.000+03:00

Today was a shitty day.....its winter here so its fucking cold....so I am sickies today... as per usual i got that awsome cold that is going around that stays with you for like 3 months.....yuck.
I went to the doctors...which always sucks...they took about half my damn blood...I am pretty tiny and I need it

On a lighter note, I finally am getting some net which is nice...its kinda screwy because its hijacked...bwaahahahahhaa!!!!.....good to be online again tho.....I miss all of you in the blog land....xoxo

This shit is bananas!!!

2006-01-20T14:37:00.000+03:00

This is... Classic

1.) Go to www.google.com
2.) Type in "failure"
3.) Press the I'm feeling lucky button (instead of the google search one)
4.) Laugh
5.) Forward to others before the Google people fix it!

Enjoy!

2005-12-20T21:39:00.000+03:00

What to say....what to say...

Been working my ass off for the past 2 weeks or so....It's insane! I feel like i don't have the time to do anything...simple things even,like meeting with my friends,shopping..fuck i don't even have the freakin time to talk on the freakin phone...what's up with that?I feel too stressed out...and to make things worse, my dad is sick and i'm so worried about him...AAHHH!!!I feel like EVERYTHING is just too much for me to handle...i need a fuckin break.....from LIFE!

Anyways,there're a lot of things that i wanna say but i can't right now.I'll writet more later when my brain is functioning correctly...Now to take my mind off things i decided to do this silly thingy... what would you be?

If I were a month, I would be: October
If I were a time, of day I would be: 03:15 A.M
If I were a sin, I would be: Lust
If I were a tree, I would be: Hibiscus
If I were a kind of weather, I would be: Stormy
If I were an animal, I would be: a cute chiwawa
If I were a color, I would be: Hot pink
If I were an element, I would be: Water
If I were a song, I would be: love song-The Cure
If I were a movie, I would be directed by: John Waters or Tarantino (sorry can't choose)
If I were a book, I would be written by: Poppy Z. Brite
If I were a taste, I would be: Chocolate
If I were a scent, I would be: lavender maybe
If I were a word, I would be: FUCK *it's my favorite word...EVER*
If I were an object, I would be:a laptop?*hey,i like sitting on ppl's laps esp if they were HOT* ;)
If I were a facial expression I would be: Pouty
If I were a shape I would be: Round!

The Great art of being nice...

2005-12-05T20:40:00.000+03:00

...and STUPID!!

apparently I'm a master in this art category.

This friend of mine broke up with her fiance yesterday...So she called me late at night to vent ,and being the NICE friend that i am,i listened and listened for like 2 hours...while she was bitching and moaning..and crying occasionally.But i had work to go to the next day and it was getting really late...3:00 am LATE!!So i was like "sweetie,i gotta go to bed now...so how about we meet for a coffee tomorrow or something and we can talk all about it"...she was like "Oh really? That's an awesome idea, I'm lucky that I have you".

I got off work early to meet up with her as planned ,but she didn't show up so i called her but there was no answer then i txted her STILL no answer i got pretty worried ,so I bought her the best coffee mix and cinnamon rolls that she loves so much, as in "Don't come to the coffee, the coffee comes to you".And I tried to call her again on my way to her house ....She finally picked it up.
The Conversation went something like this :
Me: "hey you, is everything ok?"
Her:"yeah,i'm fine"
Me:"Well, actually I was a bit worried about you since you-know-what happened..."
Her:"yeah, i heard the fone ringin but i was too lazy to pick it up"
Me"Oookay!!! I was waiting for you at the coffee shop...i thought you wanted to talk"
Her"yeah,sorry i didn't feel like it"....Bitch,if you "didn't feel like it" call or at least txt me to cancel...i LEFT my fuckin work JUST to see you!!
Me:"Oh!!...anyways, I have something to give you, can I come?"
Her:"Well, I have to go shopping with my sister in an hour."
Me:"Ok, I'll just stay by your door and give you the stuff then go."
Her:"Ok"

Then I went to her flat and gave her this little surprise and she said in a very "COLD" voice: "You know, you don't have to worry about me". I replied: "For sure I won't". Then I left without a word.

Is that the "thank you" i get?!!Damn!...The thing that I find hard to swallow is that she makes me feel like I'm almost overreacting. Lately though,she has been nothing but a moody cunt to me and i talked to her about it so many times...but all the "talking" did nothing...'cause she's STILL a selfish ungreatful fuckin bitch.I've given her so many chances and she shat on me.i'm SO done with her.I've known her for a year only. I find this friendship to be a little bit too new to make the other feel like shit without a reason.

I'm fucking pissed off...i'm definitely gonna cut her out of my life...i don't need this shit.I feel indifferent towards her anyways, but now I am very angry. I don't know if it's more about her of myself though. Probably myself.

Tick tock...tick tock...tick tock!!!

2005-11-29T20:05:00.000+03:00

For some fucked up reason I couldn't fall asleep last night even though i was super tired . I passed out around 12 am, and woke up first at about 2am, and tossed and turned until 4am . I finally fell asleep, and woke up every 15 minutes until I finally had to get up at 6am.I HATE when that happens!And it's always when you know you MUST go to work,grrrr... and you're just laying there staring at the fuckin alarm thinking, "But I have to be up in 2 hours!!!" "But I have to be up in 1 hour and 40 minutes!!!" "But I have to be up in 1 hour and 20 minutes!!!" Ugh.I'm so gonna be a coffee queen today.
All hail me.

The Art of Seduction

2005-11-24T14:16:00.000+03:00

So I just finished reading this book, the Art of Seduction by Robert Greene.It is quite profound and informative.Basically, the book is about seduction(not just in a sexual way) but how to seduce people like generally e3ni how to draw them to you, how to gain power or an upper hand if you will . It breaks it all down into types of seducers and their sly moves, it also gives examples, like the "Siren" is your Marilyn Monroe- and that's all based on beauty and sex appeal. Another example is the "Ideal Lover" and I believe Cassanova fell into this grouping. It goes into a lot of detail about how each type of seducer operates.I think every woman should read this book...even if you're not interested in attaining anything, there is a lot of information in here about the types of male seducers that could come in quite handy if you're single and dating.

Mr.Big Figures

2005-11-18T22:48:00.000+03:00

I know most of us have one, and i feel like bitching about mine.

I haven't seen him since July,Sometimes I go weeks or even months barely even thinking about him, then I'll talk to him online for awhile and BOOM I go around thinking about him 24/7.And lately most of our conversations wind up with him trying to convince me to get back together with him(though he'd never outright say "I miss you and I want you back" God forbid ) and it puts the thought in my head and i find myself obsessing over it, and is a rather pleasant thought but I really don't want to be tempted to do it (cuz god knows i have done it so many times before and it didn't work) But when I was around, was he this sweet to me? Did he even bother to express such enthusiasm for my presence? Fuck no. It's like the further away I get the more he wants me , and it's so tiring trying to act unattainable with a guy you could see yourself marrying or something.And I must admit, that a tiny part of me still hopes that if i ignored him long enough, he'll finally miss me enough to be as open as I need him to be.That's so stupid of me I KNOW,but uuuuggghhhhh....The whole thing is so addictive. I should probably be dating other people but I never get excited enough about anyone else.OH THE DRAMA!

2005-11-18T04:58:00.000+03:00

Testing...1,2,3.